to snow or not to snow

I am hoping for snow. Lots of snow. Snow day(s) for Jer. Snow angel play for boys. Hot soup or maybe a big pot of chili. Yep good old fashioned comfort food, a fire in the wood burner, and snuggling with my boys, big and little ones.

Grateful for my warm home and food in the fridge and pantry. Really grateful for an attached garage. Our new, not quite two years, home continues to be an amazing blessing in my life. Feeling kind of warm and fuzzy today.
*Happy anniversary Ned and Hannah. 2 years today.
*Only 12 short weeks till our newest Kimmel arrives. Hang in there Jen.
*Jer put the boys to bed all on his own; all was quiet in less than an hour.
*Jer scored a basket tonight @ his game
*ate dinner out w/drew alone
*had another one but it slipped away.
Time for sleep

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surprises

I wonder if the disciples evera thought when they got up that ordidary morning, that they were enjoying the dawn of a day of miracles. A day to be recorded as a lesson to all of history. As the crowds gathered on the hill to see this man of mystery preach, did they grumble knowing it might be another long day in the scorching sun? Even as a boys meager lunch grew into a feast for thousands could they have imagined how many times the events of the day would be retold, demonstrating to generations the the tender care of the Creator God? how do we view a new day? Expectantly? Grudgingly? Confident in our Saviours design for or day, for our lives? Every day we draw a breath is an example to a broken world that Jesus loves the lost, and He's waiting to save and heal each hurting soul.

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another day in paradise or two tickets to paradise

Lying on the floor of the nursery; boys are asleep. Kinda a miracle it's only 8:18 pm.

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rubber hose

Steal your heart,
Steal your nose,
Feel like you been beat with a rubber hose.

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a walk in the park

Shade trees the scent of pine
Crunching under foot

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visiting ammie (picture uploaded)

Today Jack came to my house for the first time. His Kimmel sized appetite kept him busy for the first hour or so, after which two very busy, noisy, busy boys introduced him to his calling as a Kimmel manchild. Not so sure if it was a thumbs up or thumbs down experience for him. But at the very least it was a fair and accurate introduction. A visit to the doc revealed a 12oz gain this past week to the delight of his parents and family. Still a small guy, that's Daddy's hand in the picture. So fun to see a daddy/son picture ; reminds me of how our Abba Father's hand is always present, always caring. What a sweet life we live.

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day after

Had a grand birthday. Thank you Jeremiah. You did a great job. Good food, friends, best kids in the world. The sun is making an appearance today and warming the fall air to a perfect 60° and painting the autumn landscape with reflective golden rays. Contentment fills my soul and laughter through the trials and tribulations of the day are a sweet gift from my Gentle Father.

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What's up Jack

We went to see jack and his parents this evening. So good to spend time with Ned and Hannah; but heartbroken for their ordeal. Jack is progressing as is expected for a preemie baby, but his being a preemie would not be our choice. For Hannah and Ned this is the first time experience. Experienced nurses and others keep saying, "to be expected for his early birth" or "normal for a preemie". Statements like these are meant to relieve or encourage but at times only amplify the anxious knot in their stomachs. For Jack's mommy and daddy normal would mean having their son at home with visiting grandmas and papaps, doting aunts and proud uncles gathered around being a nuisance . That would be normal. Monitors and worn vinyl love seats, tiny showers, and an occasional cranky nurse are not what they had expected. Monitors screaming alarms for no reason; the blinking numbers a constant reminder that all is not as well as it should be.
Other parents have endured far more serious medical conditions, but as a mom my heart breaks for my kids in this situation and my grandson in his tiny plastic crate. My prayer is for a quick ending to the hospital trial and for the crazy chaotic adventure of parenting a newborn to begin. O Lord may your healing mercy fall quickly and your comforting grace abound. Strengthen and encourage my dear ones. Keep their hearts strong and their gaze fixed on you.

little shoes

little shoes little shoes where will you go? little shoes little shoes scattered about little shoes little shoes no two that match. little shoes little shoes stuffed full of toes. little shoes little shoes where have you gone off to adventures laid out in advance. little shoes little shoes left prints on my heart.

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We've Got Jack

Today I have a son who is getting to know his new baby boy; caring for his wife and trusting his God for their tomorrows. Another is grieving the loss of a college friend, and wondering why the answers don't match the questions.

How life and death can walk so hand in hand is one of the great mysteries of God; and a wrestling match of emotions for this weary mom.

Sovereignty is a doctrinal certainty, this I know. But it is by faith alone, that I can begin to believe.

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Yesterday's Oswald Chambers

September 14th.
	IMAGINATION V. INSPIRATION
"The simplicity that is in Christ." 2 Corinthians 11:3 Simplicity is the secret of seeing things clearly. A saint does not think clearly for a long while, but a saint ought to see clearly without any difficulty. You cannot think a spiritual muddle clear, you have to obey it clear. In intellectual matters you can think things out, but in spiritual matters you will think yourself into cotton wool. If there is something upon which God has put His pressure, obey in that matter, bring your imagination into captivity to the obedience of Christ with regard to it and everything will become as clear as daylight. The reasoning capacity comes afterwards, but we never see along that line, we see like children; when we try to be wise we see nothing (Matthew 11:25). The tiniest thing we allow in our lives that is not under the control of the Holy Spirit is quite sufficient to account for spiritual muddle, and all the thinking we like to spend on it will never make it clear. Spiritual muddle is only made plain by obedience. Immediately we obey, we discern. This is humiliating, because when we are muddled we know the reason is in the temper of our mind. When the natural power of vision is devoted to the Holy Spirit, it becomes the power of perceiving God's will and the whole life is kept in simplicity.

Not as good as I once was....

but by the grace of God I can be BETTER than I ever was.... I have learned much of late. I can be worse than I ever was or by the grace of God continue on in the sanctification walk becoming more like Christ; saying no to the cries of the flesh and yes to self sacrifice and obedience, never mistaking the Christian life for an easy, happy, fun, lifestyle choice.

How tempting to view my sins of heart as less offensive to God than the outward and visible. Much of my life before Christ revolved around FLESH choices; laying them down and walking in purity of body and mind brought great and evident change into my life. And even today old desires, and some new ones sneak into my heart and and tap at the door of my soul seeking to gain entrance into my heart and daily walk. Mostly they are bold and brassy and catch my attention before they arrive at the gate.
Oh but the sins of the heart...those sneaky, evil, worms of self-righteousness, self pity, LAZINESS, complaining, ingratitude, impatience, prides judgmental attitude, self, self, self. How they do flourish blossom and bloom, large and vibrant, without my notice or care.
Today as every day I must choose by and through the grace of my Jesus to lay down ME and rise up in and for HIM. Please Lord Jesus let me not take what you have given me to heart or self but pour it out on You and Yours.

After reading Sept 3 from My Upmost for His Highest
2 Samue23; l6 Nevertheless, he would not drink thereof but poured it out unto the Lord

day at the fair

ok, took the horses to the fair. truck blew up on the way in. limped into the fairgrounds only to find someone blocking our reserved $50 campsite. security gets rid of offending subcompact. tow truck hauls away my big green diesel Chevy. after an evening of fair food, family, n friends we return to find the electric in the horse trailer non-functional. friends camping out are in the dark.
day one at the fair; done

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Canada 2010

Now there is a pack of super heroes for you

Drewbee and me

Three men on a ship

Squirrel watch...

after this dinner Jer was only allowed plastic silverware

Never once complained about the life jacket

Ben n Jen n baby makes three

Randy n Ned n Hannah and Jack (not visible in picture)

Sharing snacks and a quiet moment

House is quiet. Kids are asleep. Jer is out and Drew is away for the night. Only Howard interrupts my silence with his continuous yapping outside. Even with the annoying canine disruptions the peace is almost beyond my understanding. Countless stories and witty tales have bounced and rippled through my tattered mind over these long silent months. But now, time and space on my hands; I have nothing to give.

Fortunately I have countless photos from our recent annual trip north I can most likely entertain for a little while.

yippee

I was quoted today in print...it is a big deal to me; not just someone I know or someone who loves me already, but a stranger. Hopefully a new friend. Late night early wake up.

Grace does rain new every morning; I count on that or would never get out of bed.

Great Day in the Morning

Mercies are poured out.

Do not grow weary

The way it should be done

Two boys a high lift and a horse

Ice cream in bed at the Hampton

What to do when weary will not depart? Been reading Oswald Chambers again and I wish I could find my old hardback copy with old notes and musings in the margins. I have to wonder if I have made any progress or am still muddling around in the shallow waters. He leaves no room for excuses or worried fussing.
Today seemed harder than most. Not sure why really. Could be a combination or my bad attitude, feeling seriously allergy afflicted, high fatigue level, normal teen angst, and busy baby boys. Seems like typical day in the life to me. The above pictures demonstrate the joys and laughter that fills my life. I think what wearies my is my lack of ability to grasp contentment. I lack nothing. I am completely blessed and free in life and in death. Still way too often I give in to resentment and self pity wishing for a different easier life. Shame on me...
O Sweet Jesus give me Your Joy, Your Contentment, Your Patience and Courage to wake up tomorrow knowing You are carrying my heavy burden. Release me from the snare of self so I might fully give my all to You and Yours.

Take My Life

This is my new theme song...