Too late to turn back now

Jer checking it out.
Drew "helping" Jay with an equipment shed...

Work is progressing on the new house. The foundation is complete and the outside frame walls are coming tomorrow. The next week or so change will come quickly. Framing goes up quickly, but the inside works takes more time. I am both excited and sobered as my time in my "old" home grows shorter. So much living has happened here. Familiar does feel safe. Change brings adventure and new life.

Jer is done with school. We visited the school in Indiana today and Jer seemed pleased. The kids were all pleasant, plus they had sundaes as a treat after lunch. A bonus Jer did not mind.

We rode the horses until dark. Jer was showing me a few new tricks. I was "jumping" the pony over like three inch poles. Except for feeling like I was falling off; it was fun. In a super scary kind of way. Only peed myself once. ha. ha.

Time for sleep. Up too late. Oh, Dory was bred again this Saturday past. We will know if it works in another week and a half or so.

God is stepping a few sin areas. Ouch, but the knife is kind.

More Pics

KalebDrew Allen
Kaleb
Drew Allen

From the weekend in Ohio

Jer n Jasper Mia and Rose

Family Allen Kimmel

Home At Last Still at the hospital
Check out the four inch drool drip hanging from his chin
Reach for the stars

I had the honor and privilage of traveling to the city, Pittsburgh, with Allen and Stacey to pick Drew Allen from the hospital. Kaleb went with us and gets the baby of the year award. Never have I experienced a year old wee one be so good for such long tedious day. I mean it was exciting and fun for us grown ups, but to be sitting in a stoller or car seat for ten plus hours, sheww. Today I was a very proud and happy grandma, proud of the grown kids and the tickled to pieces by the wee ones. God's Grace abounded and His Joy rose high.

New Kimmel Kid

Allen and Stacy welcomed their newest son into the world early Tuesday morning. Drew Allen Michael Kimmel is a small 6lb 5oz rooming in at Magee Woman's Hospital in Pittsburgh. He has to stay until at least Monday, so far he has done real well. He was taken off the IV today. Allen says he is good. He and Stacey have been staying in Pittsburgh and Bev has Kaleb.

No, I have not been down to see him, and yes, I feel like a shmuck. I have been so tired this week I can hardly do what I need to let alone make a trip to the City. I had to go to Jer's school today, take the cat to the vet, nap...oh and eat at Bruno's. I will post a picture as soon as I have one.

The picture above is an older one but is of the first two Kimmel grand kids. Cute huh?

Ben is doing OK, going house hunting this weekend. Ned is in Cleveland and then off to Kentucky to visit the Caldwell extended family. He will be gone about six days or so. On Monday he begins his internship with David Altrogge. Seems like my family is growing bigger and better every day. Jer only has a few more days of school. I need an answer as to where to send him to school next year. I visited Seeds of Faith, the new Christian school in Indiana on Thursday. We love the folks at his current school though, and it is cheaper, and he has a bus pick him up at the front door. But, at Seeds of Faith, Debbie Caldwell would be his Middle School teacher with grades 6, 7, and 8 in one class. He would be with older kids instead of younger.

OK, off to sleep for me.
Oh, and my filly is doing well in Uniontown, but no fluids have been ordered for her yet. Tomorrow I am going to Ohio to see Mia, my other filly and see when I can bring her home.

Jer is snoring on my shoulder and my hand is falling asleep. Agghh! My family is growing.

Happy Mother's Day

I am so very glad to be a mom. I am also very blessed to have had a great mom, and a great mother-in-law. I am sad and miss them this time of year, but I am reminded that our time apart is only temporary. My mom has been gone almost seventeen years. I am tempted to grieve over all she has missed in my children's lives. Ned was only four, Jer not even a thought, Randy years from finding our home. So many adventures have come and gone; rejoicing and deep grieving. Still the Savior who prepared in advance a room for my mother, has held my heart and my home in His Hand. From her mansion in the sky it is my hope that she with the rest of the cloud of witnesses is able to look down and smile as I finish raising my kids and continue along the Road of Life laid before me.

Sleepy Saturday

I am doing something I never get to do. Saturday morning and I am lying in my bed drinking coffee, eating a bagel, and reading the online news. Jer did the barn chores. Drew made me a pot of coffee before he left for his morning chores, and I am just being lazy. We were out late last night; taking Dory to Uniontown. My vet Erin has a farm she services down there where the owner Alan Shaffer has 50 of his own mares plus those he breeds for others. He raises Standardbreds; harness racers. But he will keep Dory for the next few weeks and take care of all the breeding stuff that I have been doing. Erin is there three days a week anyway so I will save some on vet bills. I have to pay board for her and that will cost a bit, but in the long run it will be far less stressful for me so that is worth a buck or two. AND there will not be a lot of semen chatter on my end.

My house is progressing; the foundation is complete. When it quits raining Dave will come and begin the framing, which is a very exciting development. I have not been up there as much this week so I do not have any new pictures. I will work on that this weekend.

My baby calf is out in the pasture with his mama and all the other cows. He seems to be doing well. We still have several cows due to calf, but they seem to very far behind the others. A bit aggravating because it is much better if they are all on sort of the same schedule/cycle.

Well, I got a phone call and now I need to get up and get busy. I have a wedding shower and then Hannah's graduation today; thats why I have been lazin around this morning since it will be a no nap day.

This is the day the Lord has made; let us be glad and rejoice in it.

i

returning soon local channels

,been sooo tired, that when I lay the laptop on my lap the warm bottom lulls me to sleep. Vic knows. I am in the barn, but I have to get back to work, and run my little helper home. Perhaps later I will get a chance to record this week's heavy musings.

More Cement Blocks

Almost done

Our baby calf is doing better. We may let him and his mama out with the others later this weekend if he continues to improve. He is still weak and somewhat wobbly but is more alert and more active, even evading Drew as he chased after him to administer a shot of antibiotics. Now if that wasn't a sight!

We still have seven cows who should calf, but it may be that at least one maybe two of them are empty. No baby in the belly. Our bull had to be put down earlier this spring and he may have been losing strength as the season progressed last summer. Time will tell. But the grass is all greened up and the girls are all happy munching on God's natural nutrition. Speaking of natural, I have been back to the osteopathic DR I had visited a month ago and got all the scoop from the 28 tubes of blood and gallon of pee. Good and bad. That will have to come when I have at least half a brain. Enough said that I was greatly encouraged but have a pile of supplements to order. Iodine levels, and female hormones are way out of whack. Go figure. Otherwise, I should live to be 100. Has me on expensive antivirals to combat possible source of MS type symptoms. I am so sick of feeling crummy, I would drink....almost anything.

I have been a lazy writer this week. Fatigue and busyness has overwhelmed me a bit. Dory, my filly, is not pregnant. Found that out earlier this afternoon. Very disappointing after all we have been through last year. We were going to try again early next week but I think I am going to wait until her next cycle. I am just not up to the emotion or energy of it all. I want to give her a chance to come into heat on her own too, instead of using hormones. We may have been to eager this first go-round. I have two months or cycles, besides the current one, left in this breeding season; I want to make sure I give her and me the best chance we have. Each attempt, even though I have already paid for the semen, costs several hundred dollars. So the whole ordeal is taxing in a many ways.

Our foundation is almost complete. The block layers hope to finish Monday or Tuesday. Then comes the fun part, watching the frame go up. Thanks to you who have been encouraging and praying for me. All this is very wonderful, but a lot for me to take on all at once. By the time we leave our current home I will have lived in in for almost 23 years. Almost half my life. In some ways all my life. God's Time, His Plan, His Gracious Wisdom.

Various

Drew digging Dave digging
Oops where is Jer's head?

Rainy day Monday...a bit chilly too. I have a few pics from earlier last week. The rain has slowed down the progress on the block laying. Nothing exciting this weekend. Jer, Janet and I rode on Saturday. Jer had a friend over on Sunday after church. Later Drew and I took Jer, Randy, and Ned to Tom's Pizza for dinner. Umm, umm good. Greek Salad, wings, and pizza with ham and pineapple. And, for a change, sorta, we had a really nice time. Good food, good conversation, fine family time.

Our sick calf is recovering, but very slowly. We are still tube feeding him twice a day. He is sometimes eating off his mama, but not enough to sustain him. He is weak and wobbly on his feet. We make him get up and walk around after he eats. His mama is getting better at tolerating us, which is nice since she tried to cripple me last week. Ha Ha.

Jer was off school today. He went to the dentist, I had some blood drawn, and went to the Verizon store. Yish..the Verizon store is a wearing experience itself. I was fortunate to only be there for a few minutes. Of course all I got out of the trip was an 800 number to call so I could exchange my phone for a new one. Did all that, had to reprogram my current phone, strip it of all data and reboot it. I thought I had all my contact info downloaded onto my computer. Nope, some but not all. We also could not get my calander info to download. So...Yep, now I have to reload it all by hand. First finding the silly stuff. Calling to confirm times and dates, and phone numbers. Yes Rob, it will be a pain. Pray for me from your experience. I am going to wait for the new phone to come before I reload all that info. No sense and putting it on my current phone just to have to do it again in two days. Time for bed. No wise words for today. I am sure there are several parables in this Verizon experience. But alas, to weary to wonder.

Also, Why does Dave have a shovel and Drew a backhoe? It is Dave's job. Drew says he cannot find a shovel handle to fit his hand.

Hole with Cement Blocks

Hard to believe it is finally happening. By late next week the foundation with be laid. I cannot imagine how it will go from there.

Our sick calf seems to be doing better. But he has rallied and regressed before. Tonight though when right after we "tubed" a half gallon of calf formula down his throat he wobbled sixty feet over to his mama and latched on to one of her spigots and began to eat on his own. Wow. I will be glad to see him recover; it has been a challenge caring for him. Checking on him three times a day is time and energy consuming, but the emotional up and down has been hard. He is the nicest calf we have had so far; at least as far as physical appearance and overall form. He comes from the best lineage.

Today was a super day weather wise. It never got unbearably warm, and the breeze was pleasant and almost like a light summer quilt...kind of snuggly. Oh I don't know I just love sunshine and moderate temps. I guess the peace of God was just upon me today. The contentment that embraces me fills me with such a heavy sense of God's Goodness.

Ned was out with some guys from REC. They did not get a good turnout and the small crowd left early. Ned called in some reinforcements to help eat the extra brats and mountain pie stuff. As far as I know eating and fire watching is still going on. I am so proud of him. Again God's grace abounds and is evidenced in Ned's gratefulness and gentle spirit. Much going on in that young man's life.

Again, sleep beckons. See His Goodness in the simple stuff and rejoice.

Pictures of a hole

Half a holeDave's helper Justin View from my bedroom

Two roads are visible in the picture above. The road closer to the top of the frame is Dutch Run Road. If you do not turn right at the church onto Kimmel School road but continue on down not even a quarter mile, you would be on this stretch of road. The wooden posts in the picture are about 25" outside my bedroom window; they will connect to the horse barn when it is built. The walk to the barn will be more like a hop. Well, OK...I do not hop. But it will not be very far. I will be able to talk to the horses from the house. Yes, they will answer.

My thigh is more sore today than it was yesterday, but still not as bad as it could have been. I am very grateful. Our little sick calf is doing much better. Drew and I dumped, literally, a bag of electrolytes down its throat this morning and a bag a calf baby formula this evening around five. We went up to check on him around nine and he was up walking around looking for an evening snack from his mama. This is a very good sign. We had been going to give him some more electrolytes but decided just to leave them alone and see how he is in the morning. I have been praying for him, and God has been good.

I did not make it to Care Group, again. Bummer. Got in from the barn late, dinner was late. So it was too late to go. My disciplines are so weak. But so am I lately. It seem like I have no energy what so ever. I know my thyroid is still not regulated. I go back to see the new doc next Wednesday and am anxious to see what he has to say. I am waiting for one more picture to upload and I am going to sleep. Enough adventure for one day.

I love this picture. Jer and Lucy contemplating.

Cow Kicked

Got me first kick from a cow today. I have been kicked at, even bunted over by an angry mama, but never kicked at and hit like I was today. We have this ailing calf and his mother is very hesitant to let us near him. More than hesitant down right resistant. Impossible to intimidate she stands her ground with fierce determination. Most cows can be herded into the head gate or across the pasture, generally in the direction you want them to go. This girl here does not move, or if she does, she turns stars you down, and with great hostility lumbers away from my big mouth and waving arms. She will charge, fully appreciating her huge size advantage. Knowing this I have always proceeded with caution when trying to convince her that my way was the right way. Ha...Today heading slowing in the direction I was hoping for she unleashed a rear leg with power and intent to maim. Fortunately for me her strike though painful enough to bring a tear or two did no real damage. A small round purple blotch decorates the fattiest chunk of my upper left thigh. A skinny girl would have suffered real damage. For once I was glad to be chubby. A kick forceful enough to have snapped an unprotected bone landed squarely across both my flabby thighs. God sometimes protects us from our foolishness with our liabilities. Who would ever think fat legs would be a blessing. His mysterious ways.

Hmmm...Updates

Ben spent a relaxing weekend in NYC with some college buddies and some of the dads. Sounds like they had fun and did not whoop it up too much. His eye is some better, at least he is driving. He was supposed to go to the DR's today, an opthamologist, to check the progress. But the whole process is challenging for him. His neuro guy says it could take a few months until the full effect of the steroids is seen. So, Ben opted to wait a few more weeks instead of going now and they again. I guess he can see improvement but not complete restoration. This is a good thing as the last time he had trouble his eye got worse and stayed worse. I continue to pray he will see it as God's healing mercy and turn to Him for a heart restoration.

Allen is doing well. Waiting for son number two; should only be a few weeks. He worked for Drew today to fill in for Ben who did not get home until this afternoon. I picked him up this morning so I got to spend some time yacking. Good to see him.

Randy is working for a tree farmer part time/under the table. Shhh. Also seems to be doing well. Managing his money and taking better care of himself and his apartment than I have seen for a while. Easier to talk to, no so random or hostile.

I am leftover exhausted from yesterday I think. My legs started to get pretty achy by this evening. I am in bed on a heating pad. Heh.

God's peace has filled me in a new way these last few days. Not sure what's going on, except maybe I am beginning in a very small way to be more releasing with myself and those who trespass against me. A bit tongue in cheek here. Aye? But a lot of truth in the humor.

I took some pictures this evening of our growing hole on the hill but the camera and the necessary cord are downstairs in the kitchen. Not going back down there. Tune in tomorrow I guess.

Loving the weather my God has provided. Nite All.

Oh Vic, I am oh so very sorry about the fall. Good girl not to even look around. Just pick yourself up and hold your head tall.

Walk Complete

First flowers planted in the woods to the left behind the "house"And the day is done

Jer and I successfully completed the 2008 MS Walk. We walked the entire distance and were not the last walkers for the first time. I can tell I am in better shape, I did not feel like I could not take another step until the last quarter mile or so. Though they did change the route for the walk and eliminated several of the worst hills. Also, the weather was very cooperative with cooler temperatures and no rain. We had only a few walkers but still a great day as it was fun to see Jer make it through with much less effort than in the past. He had a friend from school come along; kind of looks like Dennis the Menace. His name is Denton...I had to keep calling him back; Jer and I slowed him down. But, I think he kept us going.

I always thought most of the books of the major prophets were long. Yesterday, I discovered a very short one, but direct and to the point.

The prophet Jeremiah gave a message to Baruch son of Neriah in the fourth year of the reign of Jehoiakim the son of Josiah, after Baruch had written down everything Jeremiah had dictated to him. He said, "This is what the Lord God of Israel says to you Baruch: you have said. 'I am overwhelmed with trouble! Haven't I had enough pain already? And now the Lord has added more! I am weary of my own sighing and can find no rest.' "Baruch, this is what the Lord says: I will destroy this nation that I built. I will uproot what I had planted. Are you seeking things for yourself? Don't do it! But don't be discouraged. I will bring great disaster upon these people, but I will protect you wherever you go. I the Lord have spoken!"

Jeremiah 45... New Living Translation.

The following is from the study notes from my Bible.

God told Barach to take his eyes off himself and whatever rewards he thought he deserved. If he did this God would protect him. It is easy to lose the joy in serving God when we take our eyes off of him. The more we look away from God's purposes toward our own sacrifices the more frustrated we become. As you serve God beware of focusing on what you are giving up. When this happens ask for God's forgiveness and look at him rather than yourself.

So very often I am looking at my sacrifices more than I am focusing on the Lord. God has been bringing me back over and over to the core, it is really not at all about me. It is all about Him. When I serve my family and I believe I do not get the appreciation I deserve the old martyr gear kicks in and my spiritual ego inflates. "Oh, what a diligent servant I am. How blessed the Lord must be at my dusty little pile of pebbles I am piling up for myself here on earth." My insignificant sacrifice is of far less significance than one grain of sand on all the shores of all the oceans and seas on all of the earth that He spoke into being.

Of course He is pleased when we are obedient, for to obey is better than sacrifice; and HE promises to reward us for our feeble acts of obedience, but at His discretion and in His time. Not ours. Never when I think I deserve it, 'cause I never deserve it. And, like the scripture says when I focus on my sacrifice, my motives are twisted and I become discouraged and frustrated. I have stepped out of His perfect order and into my own agenda. Very bad news. Thank you oh Lord for continuing to remind me that I am not in charge. And that is a VERY good thing.

Permits Have Been Issued

Six little cows all in a rowVery blurry but you get the idea...

Yes, and we do have a building permit. Drew has begun to dig out the foundation and the driveway to the house is more or less in. Probably anyone but Rob could drive up to the house. Low riders may still experience a bit of a drag. The whole sewage thing is still bit up in the air. Technically we have permission to build and the DEP did approve a spot for a sand mound, but I believe we may be pursuing a different option. The DEP site is directly behind and uphill of our back porch and installation there would involve removing substantial portion of the woods we had hoped to gaze at while drinking morning coffee. Heh...I have been very busy doing busy stuff. No new calves or anything. Just running around stuff. Now it is nap time. Did not even get one yesterday. God is moving on my heart in so many ways and that is a total blast. Maybe later tonight I can get some of it down before I forget. Ha Ha.

A Cow's Eye View

No cows can be seen in this picture because they are all behind me; this is their view of the farm. The little house where the previous owners still live is just behind the large barn. Our new home will be on the opposite hill to the far left, out of the picture. We have been very busy even though we have not had any new cows. We still have eight left to calf, one heifer, a new mom. They are the hard ones. Other than her we are hoping for an easier time of it now.

The septic guys are coming back out tomorrow. Several things could happen. We did hire an independent engineer today; hopefully he will be able to be here in the morning and give us the professional back up we need.

We had a grand birthday party for Drew Sunday night...at the Indiana Roller Rink. Everyone especially Drew had a blast. Over 5o friends and family showed up, a great success. Drew was truly blessed.

Ben drove himself to work today. His eyes seem to be improving. The right eye is the same, bad, but the left seems to be regaining some lost vision. Please keep praying. Pray he sees God as his Healer.

My filly, Dory, is going to be bred on Thursday. Yes Rob, shipped semen and the whole bit. We are praying she takes and we have more success than last year. Less $$ too please.

Had a good riding day, me and Jer on Poco up at the cow farm, (not at the same time) and Jer riding Sonny at home in the arena. They looked wonderful. Sonny had a lesson yesterday as Christy rode him and Joey. Both seem to have benefited from their instructions. Ha Ha.

To tired for humor or pithy...God blessed us with a fantastic day. Dory, the septic, Ben, good horse behavior; He is a wonderful God. So much more than I could ask for or even imagine.

Up Close and Real Personal

A new bull calf. A very large bull calf. Jer and Drew had to pull again. I thought for a while that we were not going to get it out. Details will follow.

A Day in My Life

Its like she was posing just for me, only right after I took this with my phone...she pooped in the hay. So cute and yet so disgusting. So like life. Don't ya think?

My Internet is down. I am tethered to my phone, but its battery is almost dead, can't charge and tether at the same time.

The cow in the hay and now the poop in the hay remind me how seamlessly all of life's adventure pass from glorious to terrifying. We have signs of new life all around us; our calves, budding flowers, greening grass, waking up every morning. Yet, tragedy can be just a breath away. I am not looking at any of the stuff happening in our family as tragedies, but one could I suppose.

Ben's eyes seem worse not better after his three day treatment. I drove him to work today and will again tomorrow. By the end of work today he said he could hardly see at all. My heart seems fractured in a thousand directions. I cried for the first time at care group tonight, more like a sniffly whimper, but still the pain of my son's situation came crashing in on me. I have a faith for healing, for his salvation; but as a mom I can barely stand to think of what this must be like for him. Surely, I would take it if I could.

Our application for a sewerage permit was rejected, says we cannot even have a sand mound. We are in the process of appealing it, sort of and there are options we are exploring. But initially, the shock was like a sucker punch. The whole thing is ludicrous when all the facts are laid out. But I am tired and my phone is dying. I believe the permit will come, but at what cost to Drew's character. He is livid, with some good reason, but if you know him you understand how he is responding. It has been very difficult for all of us.

Please pray Ben will turn to the Lord for his comfort, healing, and peace. Pray his eyes will be healed and he will praise God for the miracle of it.

Sunday Morning Calf

Here I am Yes, that's my bum...
670A gets a tag
Cutest calf ever; won't suck, nurse, or otherwise grab the milk spigot. At least not whereas we can tell. She seems to be healthy. We think she may be a midnight snacker as she very strong and does not appear to be lacking nourishment. Her mother is a wild thing though which makes working with either of them a challenge. I had promised an entertaining story, but its late and a picture is worth a thousand words

Sunset

Drew and I just got back from checking on the cows. I took this picture from out behind the cow barn. It did not come out as clearly as I had hoped. The cows are lined up along the fence higher up on the hill to the left of the view. Let it be said that the sunset was incredible. Our house will sit on higher ground yet. We let two calves out into the pasture today. This morning Drew let out #8, the little one born on Wednesday. Tonight we released #2 and 2A. Its so cute to watch the calves run and kick and jump.

Ben had his first IV treatment this afternoon. He said it went OK.

You are so right about the sand mound thing Rob. I guess they were designed for warm/hot climates with sandy soil base. A far cry from western Pennsylvania.

I continue to walk in His Grace, knowing He holds my family, my home, my future, and my eternity in His scarred Hand.