Monday, September 25, 2006
Monday..usually not the greatest day of the week. Yet, today was not so awful. I succeded in making a decent dinner, served a bit late, but still satisfied the hungry men.
Took Randy to the Dr.s, which made him very happy, happy that I took time out just for him. Randy is often dissappointed by his perceived lack of personal attention. So for me to go into town just to take him someplace, someplace he could have easily taken the bus, was a big deal. After his appointment I brought him out to the house. Randy did a few chores for $$ and I napped a bit.
I helped Jer with his homework which he finished before dinner for the first time ever. No tears were shed, not even any real whining or complaining. Randy had gotten him started and Jer just kept at it until he was finished. I had to rein him in a couple of times but for the most part he plodded along until all was complete. Victory for the school boy. God is good.
'Rode Cool twice today. Once before I went to town, if only for a few minutes. I had taken Drew a few sandwiches and a bottle of water. By the time I got back home I only had a short time before I had to leave again; this time to get Randy. And by the way, suprisingly, I was on time to pick him up. Another point for mom.
After tossing the meatloaf in the oven Jer, Randy, I led Cool up to the arena. She was a real good girl. Jer rode her for ten minutes or so. After that Randy rode; I was so blessed. She just went around the big oval like an old tail mare. As good as she was at a walk, she was a bit hesitant to pick up the pace for Randy. He had her at a Corto for a few paces but then she would get antsy or stay at a walk. After Randy rode I took my turn.
Tonight my horse gave me all I expect and more. True she is not ready for the trail, but as the sun sank in the western sky my girl Cool proved that the day is coming soon when her and I will scale the big hill across the road.
Monday, September 18, 2006
I gotta quit for now, I need to get a nap...Will finish story a little later
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Monday, September 11, 2006
Fifth anniversary of the September 11 tragedy; sure is hard to believe it has been five years. In five years how many lives are still scarred? Still waiting for “closure” to come? So often I hear about closure; how someone who has painfully lost a loved one or suffered some other significant trauma needs to find closure. I wish I knew where that was kept. I have lost both of my parent-in-laws, my mother, heard my twenty year old son diagnosed with MS, endured my own health issues, and lived in a love-challenged marriage for over twenty years. I am not so sure that closure exists. We continue to live our lives gingerly placing one foot in front of the next, one day at a time. Everyone who breaths air carries a basket of pain uniquely their own. If they have experienced God’s all compassionate grace, the burden will lighten and even be lifted. But the painful memories will still live on in a corner of their heart. Pain is what gives evidence of life, and as a result allows a person to experience joy, contentment, and love. Without pain’s power we have nothing to compare to life’s pleasures. Would closure eliminate that pain? Some pain has no explanation, no logical reasoning to elucidate its occurrence. Finding the killer of rapist or perpetrator of one’s assault may bring a chronological ending to painful event, but it will not eliminate the action or the actor. And hence not remove the painful wounds or scars. Does closure release a person to continue on living? I believe for that to happen a person must make an internal decision. We must choose to turn our eyes away from the pain, and to focus on God’s love; other loved ones who may need us desperately. If we can acknowledging the presence of heartache, realizing its power to propel us forward, and harness that power for our own betterment. Others will then also benefit from our experience and Glory will be give to a God who loves without condition and gives a peace that passes all understanding not as a replacement for pain, but as a healing balm, that allows us to endure all worldly afflictions until He takes us home to paradise.